Keiner mag Frankreich


France has neither winter, nor summer, nor morals. Apart from these drawbacks it is a fine country. France has usually been governed by prostitutes."
Mark Twain.

"I would rather have a German division in front of me than a French one behind me."
General George S. Patton.

"Going to war without France is like going deer hunting without your accordion."
Norman Schwartzkopf.

"We can stand here like the French, or we can do something about it."
Marge Simpson.

"As far as I'm concerned, war always means failure."
Jacques Chirac.

"As far as France is concerned, you're right."
Rush Limbaugh.

"The only time France wants us to go to war is when the German Army is sitting in Paris sipping coffee."
Regis Philbin.

"You know why the French don't want to bomb Saddam Hussein? Because he hates America, loves mistresses and wears a beret. He is French, people!"
Conan O'Brien.

"I don't know why people are surprised that France won't help us get Saddam out of Iraq. After all, France wouldn't help us get Hitler out of France either."
Jay Leno.

"The last time the French asked for 'more proof' it came marching into Paris under a German flag."
David Letterman.

"Only thing worse than a Frenchman, is a Frenchman who lives in Canada."
Ted Nugent.

"War without France would be like ... uh ... World War II. The favorite bumper sticker in Washington now is one that says 'First Iraq, then France.'"
Tom Brokaw.

"What do you expect from a culture and a nation that exerted more of its national will fighting against DisneyWorld and Big Macs than the Nazis?"
Dennis Miller.

"It is important to remember that the French have always been there when they needed us."
Alan Kent.

"They've taken their own precautions against al-Qa'ida. To prepare for an attack, each Frenchman is urged to keep duct tape, a white flag, and a three-day supply of mistresses in the house."
Argus Hamilton.

"Somebody was telling me about the French Army rifle that was being advertised on eBay the other day -- the description was, 'Never shot. Dropped once.'"
Rep. Roy Blunt (MO).

"The French will only agree to go to war when we've proven we've found truffles in Iraq."
Dennis Miller.